Gingerbread houses!

My sister and I decorated a gingerbread house. And it is awesome.
If your definition of awesome is something like 'looks like it was decorated by a color-blind psychotic spider monkey'.

First off, I got distracted.
The gingerbread man in the kit was more like a gingerbreak man (that's not actually funny, but a typo I made earlier and giggled at), and I couldn't fix him with frosting. So I set about making blood frosting so I could make his gory demise.
I mashed a red M&M in some white frosting and my mom laughed at me and called me adorable (we were also in a pseudo-fight because she contested one of my reasons why I would be awesome in a zombie apocalypse so I was already mad at her) and I got mad at her.
Then I mixed about four thousand red hots in it, and nothing happened.
So I put the frosting in the microwave even though it specifically says not to, and that made the red hots all soft and squishy and I mashed them up.
Here is what my blood looked like, fresh from the microwave:



So excellent.
Then I proceeded to make the gingerbreak man's death scene:



I also made his face.
I wanted to do little fondant Xs for his eyes but it is really hard to work with such tiny pieces.

Then I got really bored with the whole thing and just put frosting everywhere and pressed candy into it, like the awesome, easily distracted person I am.

Here is the front:



That thing across it is the crime scene tape my sister made. There is also a snowman, on the left, face-down. He was the murderer. You can't quite see it, but there is a tiny fondant pistol by his head.
Also, behind the gingerbread house is the espresso maker, which I love more than all of you guys. I really like espresso.
The martini glass is there because that is what I used to store the sprinkles.

This is the right side of it:



I don't have anything much to say about this, but I like the disorder on the eaves. I was trying for a pattern at first, but then remembered that I didn't care.
Also, there is half a tree on the tip of the roof, and half of it pasted to the roof side. It was going to sit on the roof like the most awesome weather-vane/holiday set-up ever, but then it decided to break and be affected by gravity.

This is the back of the house:



It is all blurry because my hands are always shaky and whatnot, but I like to think that I opened up a portal to another dimension because my house was so aesthetically unpleasant. A dimension where straight lines and neatness do not matter at all.
It also looks kind of slanted, like the weight of its awesome decoration is too much to bear. Or the earlier dimensional-rift explanation.

Here is the left side of the house:



Unlike the right side, I didn't even try to start with any semblance of order, pattern, or care. I just started glopping on frosting and pressing in tiny candies, sometimes pressing them on by the handful and letting the ones that didn't stick simply fall to their doom.

Or, in short, I am really very good at decorating houses.

I say that I am, because Bonnie was working on tiny fondant pistols, and tiny fondant bows, and M&M wreaths, and fondant crime scene tape while I was demonstrating my inability to deal with gingerbread houses like a normal person.
So, it was mostly me.
Most of the insanity/awesomeness, at least.
Any way, I like it. It's the most festive I have been since about three years ago (we do not even have a tree up or lights at our house and I have purchased presents for exactly zero people).